Dr. Miho Takao, an obstetrician-gynecologist, brightens those around her with her cheerful smile and positive words, making them feel lighthearted. How was her dignified and straightforward posture developed? We will explore her way of life and thinking, reflecting on the ups and downs she’s experienced.
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● Growing up with a broad perspective, never being denied
● All things change
● To use 24 hours a day cheerfully and meaningfully, start with “sleep”
Growing up with a broad perspective, never being denied
Dr. Takao told us that she recovers from setbacks with surprising speed. When asked about her childhood, she reminisced with a laugh, “Even when served stuffed bell peppers, I would only eat the peppers.” It seems that her upbringing holds some clues to what makes her who she is today.
“Even if I didn’t eat the meat, my parents wouldn’t scold me by saying, ‘Eat properly.’ Instead, they’d say, ‘You don’t have to eat it, but I won’t make anything else, so you’ll have to manage on your own.’ Perhaps they were naturally teaching me that freedom comes with responsibility.
I was never denied my individuality and was allowed to do what I wanted freely. Even when I was bullied in junior high school, they listened carefully and respected my choices. I think being seven years younger than my brother and thus living surrounded by adults played a big role. I was raised with a lot of love and care.”
Her mother was a tea ceremony teacher, so adults were always coming and going to their house for lessons. Sometimes, they would bring their children, and she would talk and play with them. This childhood, filled with opportunities to interact with various adults and children of different ages, formed the foundation of Dr. Takao’s current way of thinking.
“Conversations with peers usually come from the same sources of information, but it’s interesting to talk with people of different ages because their perspectives are so different. Growing up without being denied and learning about a wide range of ideas through interacting with diverse people – I feel that these two factors have built the base of who I am now.“
All things change
Dr. Takao has another secret to recovering from setbacks: “Even when facing hardship, I don’t think, ‘I want to go back to how things were.’“
“I experience this every day in my profession. Mothers who have given birth all say, ‘I want to go back to how I was before pregnancy.’ But the skin on the stomach stretches, and the pelvis changes. You can’t go back to the way you were before pregnancy. It’s more constructive to think, ‘If there’s something bothering me now, let’s try to make that better.’
Everything is always changing. So even if you’re dealing with worries or hardships now, you don’t have to think that the same situation will last forever.
Childcare, work, friendships, relationships with parents and partners… everyone has their worries at different times. But children grow, and the world and society change. What is considered common sense now may have been completely unconventional ten years ago. Don’t you think society’s views on LGBTQ+ have changed significantly compared to a while ago?”
“Even this table in front of me, which seems to remain pristine, is constantly changing at a microscopic level. At my core, I believe that it’s physically impossible for anything to return to its original state.“
We all have moments when we regret the past or get caught up in “what-ifs,” thinking, “If only I hadn’t said that,” or “If only that situation had been different.” But the past cannot be changed, and everything is in flux. Nothing lasts forever. Just knowing this can be reassuring even if you find yourself lost in the dark someday. It’s a thought that can serve as a protective charm in times of need.
To spend 24 hours cheerfully and meaningfully, start with “sleep”
“If you’re exhausted, feeling down, and think there’s nothing you can do, try starting with sleep,” says Dr. Takao.
Dr. Takao herself used to work at a university hospital, where she was constantly on call for childbirth, 24 hours a day. However, as she got older, she felt her performance decline during the day. She studied sleep medicine and deeply understood its importance. She decided to change her work style, leaving the university hospital before turning 40. She chose her current clinic job, which doesn’t require night shifts.
“Sleep is more important than you might think. A good night’s sleep can improve your mood and physical condition during the day. However, even when I say this, people often respond with, ‘Yeah, sleep is important, but I can’t seem to get enough.'”
But everyone has 24 hours a day. You have to take the initiative to change how you use that time meaningfully, and you can definitely change it. Try to think of sleeping time as a way to enhance your waking hours.“
Dr. Takao encourages people to re-examine their environment to improve their sleep. This includes things like avoiding computers and smartphones right before bed and creating a comfortable bedroom environment.
“If you have trouble sleeping deeply or wake up easily during the night, try to identify the cause. If worries or anxieties are keeping you awake, don’t force yourself to sleep. You’ll be able to sleep within three or four days. Just as we can’t live without eating, we can’t live without sleeping. So even if you can’t sleep tonight, you’ll surely be able to sleep by the fourth night. Try to think of it that way.”
In the next vol.3, we will discuss how to interact with close friends who are feeling down and how to nurture relationships with those around you, which becomes even more important as you age.
This flamingo-marked notebook is my original creation, which I make every year.
I also handwrite a quote that resonates with me each year and print it on the cover.”
